Toddlers v. Sociopaths

by kirael826 on August 22, 2011

I have become convinced that my two and half year old daughter is progressively implementing a maniacal plot to drive me insane. Clearly, she has figured out, with me out of the picture she can rule the household with ease.  Daily, it’s like existing in a loop of “Who’s on First” the old Abbott and Costello act.  (If you’re not familiar with it check it out HERE). I will ask her what cereal she wants for breakfast and then upon delivery she will protest and screech as if I just served her a bowl of dried bugs and insist that she did not want THAT cereal. Then she’ll look up at me sweetly and smile, while simultaneously rolling her eyes (I thought they weren’t supposed to do that until they were teenagers!?).   We will repeat this same scenario all day long with clothes, shoes, bags, toys, snacks…..it’s endless.  In between these “you did/I didn’t” decision making showdowns, she will repeatedly call “Mama” and when I respond she will stare at me blankly.  I will ask her “what do you want Addison?” in an increasingly agitated voice. Still silence.  Then, just to change it up a bit, about every third or fourth time she will say something, but she will say it very quietly and mumble.  At this point, I will stupidly inquire further, recognizing the annoyed tone of my first response and trying to rectify the situation by sweetly saying “yes, darling, what do you need? Can you speak up, Mommy can’t understand you?”.  She will grin (wickedly) and then again repeat the mumbled sentence lowering her volume even further.  At this point,  I begin to wonder if it’s too soon to open a bottle a wine for the day, really 9 a.m. is okay right, it’s the same thing as having a mimosa with brunch on Sunday?

While I suspect her behavior is nothing out of the ordinary for a toddler  considering parenting books refer to the stage as the more common  ”terrible twos”, but also  ”the tyrannical twos” ” the toddler terrorists” and “the only child maker” to name just a few.   However, I couldn’t help but allow curiosity (and google) to get the better of me and I happened to look up common traits of sociopaths.  Is it just me, or for those who are living in or lived through the toddler years, do these seem eerily familiar?

Top 8 Traits of Sociopaths: 

1.  Lack of Empathy
They often see other people as objects for their personal gratification.

2. Shallow Emotions
They may often put on short-lived, dramatic displays of emotion, such as fits of rage, only to quickly revert to a calm state moments later.

3. Lying and Manipulativeness
Completely indifferent to the possibility of being caught in a lie and when caught in a lie, they are rarely perplexed or embarassed. Without hesitating, they will simply rework the tale so that the lie appears consistent.

4. Impulsivity and Irresponsibility
Impulsive by nature. They do not deeply recognize the risk of being caught, disbelieved or injured as a result of their behavior. They seek quick satisfaction and thrills. Their crimes are often spur-of-moment affairs.

5. Low Tolerance for Boredom
An excessive need for excitement and stimulation, frequently break rules, commit crimes, and risk their safety for the sake of cheap thrills

6. Poor Behavior Controls
 Notorious for hair-trigger tempers, highly reactive to perceived insults and slights, and throw tantrums over trivialities

7. Remorselessness
Even when aware of the consequences, they frequently shrug off all responsibility for what happens to their victims and even to themselves and they often blame their victims for their crimes.

8. Egocentricity
They think they are the center of the universe and see themselves as superior beings.

 

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Little Things

by kirael826 on August 9, 2011

This past weekend, I attended the annual BlogHer conference in San Diego. While there, I met and listened to some phenomenal women. These are women who have done BIG things.  They’ve written about their experiences living in countries where they are oppressed, potentially incurring severe consequences.  They’ve climbed corporate ladders to become one of only 12 female CEO’s of Fortune 500 companies in the country.  They’ve fought for the credibility of women’s voices in all aspects of American media and they’ve campaigned for women to have the right to birth a baby in whatever way they choose.  It was both inspiring and humbling, and I admit it left me questioning the value of my day to day efforts.

However, then I began reading the comments from friends, family and total strangers on the very first post I’ve had widely published.  I was moved by the words, and even more by the encouragement to keep doing what I’m doing.  I cried. Multiple times. It reminded me that it’s not only the BIG accomplishments in life that change the world and make it better, but the smallest of daily gestures.  In our busy lives it can become so easy to exist in our own minds and our own lives, that we often fail to see or acknowledge those around us.  Yet, when we take just a moment to stop, to look,  to thank the person who prepared our “extra hot” latte, or to give a reassuring and knowing glance to a frazzled Mom with screaming kids at Target, or even to just leave a comment on a friend or complete stranger’s blog post – we change the world, we make it better.  I can honestly say to all of you who took that moment in the last few days – I’m changed. I’m better. Thank you.

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My Post Featured on Mamapedia

August 6, 2011

Very Exciting, my post “From a Soccer Mom to Her Little Boy” was featured on Mamapedia Voices today. Please fee fee to click over to Mamapedia and check it out and leave comment. If you’re visiting my blog today as a result of that post, welcome! I’m so glad you liked the piece and I [...]

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What Would Wonder Woman Do?

August 5, 2011

I am attending BlogHer this weekend and meeting some amazing new bloggers.  Although our attentions spans suffer in this country and most of us no longer have this news story on our radar’s any longer. I thought this post by April Wilson from her blog What Would Wonder Woman Do, was particularly compelling and speaks [...]

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Healthy School Lunches

August 3, 2011

Can you believe that the kiddos go back to school so soon, mine actually start on Monday (yes, Monday)!   Well if you check out a little bit more about me on my Work& Play tab, you will discover that I write for a regional parenting magazine, SWFL Parent & Child.  One of my first [...]

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I Wouldn’t Change A Thing… C’mon Really?

August 2, 2011

I spend an awful lot of time with moms, reading about moms, seeing moms on TV, writing about moms and being a mom.  Constantly, I hear statements (and make them myself) along the lines of “I’m so exhausted and I just wish I could get even 10 seconds in my day to pee by myself, [...]

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From a Soccer Mom to Her Little Boy

May 13, 2011

As your mother, it is impossible not to constantly question whether I’m making the right decisions for you.  I worry. All the time. About almost everything. Lately, one of my worries has been about how much is too much when it comes to allowing you to pursue your soccer dreams.  In my mind, you’re still [...]

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Pregnant Flash Mob (yes, you read that right)

May 11, 2011

This popped up over at one of my favorite blogs, Cafemom today.  These very brave women were helping raise awareness for March of Dimes with a tribute to Motherhood.  It puts Justin Bieber in a whole other light.  It will make you laugh and then cry and if you’re a Mom you might just pee [...]

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16 Things Moms Really Want for Mother’s Day

May 2, 2011

A well-known author and blogger, Lynn Harris recently had this piece picked up at Babble.com.  It was brilliant (at least I thought so).  Enjoy! There’s nothing I want less for Mother’s Day than the stuff I’m supposed to want (margin of error: 1 massage). I mean, roses? They’re fragrant and all, but guess who’s going [...]

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Gifts That Give Back for Mother’s Day

April 30, 2011

This isn’t a traditional gift, but as Moms we care as much about other people’s children as we do our own.  When we know our children are safely tucked in their beds with warm meals and a roof over their heads, our hearts go out to those children without such necessities.  So, this year, maybe [...]

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